Budget Rebel Gifts

Be flamboyant-today living within your means is mucking-up the economy.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

'You're developing a reputation as something of a cowboy, Henderson.'

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

European Union: Entering a prohibitive tax zone.

"Everything's gone up."

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'We decided the current system for reviewing corporation tax was too complex so we'll trial the 'think of a number and then double it' method.'

Do not think outside the box!

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

"It drives me mad when people act as though we had nothing to do except write moronic memorandum..."

'Sorry, you failed the aptitude test.' -'Thankfully I own the company.'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'I need affordable daycare now!'

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

'The company was quite generous. They gave me a whole day off for the funeral.'

"The figures for the last quarter are in. We made significant gains in the fifteen-to-twenty-six-year-old age group, but we lost our immortal souls."

"The holidays are finished George, get over it!"

Please be seated. A jack booted government thug will be with you shortly.

'And I see that Derek continues to ignore our company's dress code...'

'If the universe and everything in it is expanding, how come our budget gets shrunk all the time?'

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."

'We've got trouble, Henderson - Your people got with my people and decided they didn't need us.'

"What're you doing? Your contract forbids you from watching 'cute baby video' on YouTube."

I stamped out smiley faces in your handwritten memos, and by George, I'll do the same with emoticons in your emails!

"Yeah? Well, tell him that in this company Gandhi-like resistance wouldn't have worked for Gandhi, either."

'The hospital needs to cut its drug budget...Mrs Miggins will be seeing what she can do for the Oncology department with hot twigs and frogspawn...'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

"If I could quit tomorrow, I'd be gone yesterday."