Budget Film Maker Gifts

Movies made for under eight million dollars.

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

Herman Mankiewicz

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

Working in the Hazard Zone!

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

Canadian film production

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

'Dad, would you ming standing up, then accidentally tripping on the dog and falling flat on your face? I'll try to get it in one shot.'

"I think I should tell you, I'm CGI."

"Which part are you reading for?"

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."