Budget Consultant Gifts

"Gee, Dave, a proposal to balance the budget wasn't really what I was expecting."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"Who's got the hammer?"

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

"You need to justify your own existence first."

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

"What comes after zillion?"

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

And this is a little ditty I wrote called 'the third quarters profit and loss account' ...Colin often wished that he'd followed his first love and taken up a career as a musician

'I wonder how the economy is doing.'

'We grow our food, have solar energy, use bikes instead of car...now if we could only stop buying knickknacks!'

'I couldn't imagine bringing a child into the current fiscal-cliffy world.'

Keep the econoimy moving

"This guy might like fiddling with numbers, Dad – but is he any good at sums?"

'We spend a lot, borrow a lot, tax a lot. It keeps things from getting boring.'

City Finance Dept: My Way/The Highway

"Unfortunately the first thing they cut was the stationery budget..."

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

"The good news is that profits are up 76%. . . The BAD news is that costs are up 83%."

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."