Budgeting Expert Gifts

"Son, can you spare a couple of minutes to talk about your tuition?"

Infrastructure Collapse.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

Fuel bill gone through the roof

Investing your savings

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"What comes after zillion?"

'Well I've finished the project on time and on budget!' 'Oh, that means I've given you too much time and too much money!'

'We grow our food, have solar energy, use bikes instead of car...now if we could only stop buying knickknacks!'

'I couldn't imagine bringing a child into the current fiscal-cliffy world.'

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"The good news is that profits are up 76%. . . The BAD news is that costs are up 83%."

"This guy might like fiddling with numbers, Dad – but is he any good at sums?"

Blowing dust off an order book.

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

"I hate check writing, but, hey, it pays the bills."

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

'We've gone over your budget very carefully, Mr Thorne. Unfortunately the network does not sell 7-second spots.'

". . . We're being sucked into the UK national debt!"

"No, unfortunately I won't be raising your debt ceiling."

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"

Small Businesses Go Under.

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly