Budget Balancing Expert Gifts

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

To do before Saturday...

'There will be no raises this year since the state now has a lottery.'

Expenses/Income. "Our only problem is working out how to switch these."

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

State Budget.

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'Do you remember the good old days when April 15 was the only 'fiscal cliff' people worried about?'

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'I cut myself slashing the budget!'

The good news is that I've got all the figures...the BAD news is that I'm not sure what order to put them in!

Help!!! I've been kidnapped - Your Money.

'How can they call it a shared sacrifice in this bad economy...when your pay cut was 10% and mine, 25%?!'

The Costs Of Doing War.

The economy and the environment.

'Office of not much budget, and even less management! Yomp speaking!'

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

Run in the Family

Three people view wine price 3 ways.

Euro parachute is not keeping Europe aloft.

'Every year local authorities whinge on about needing more money to maintain services.'

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

'When you've a minute could you design a new health infrastructure for the area with budget forecasts staffing requirements and job descriptions...tomorrow will do.'

"I asked my friends over to see how much the adults are leaving us to pay off!"

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

"...And this is Mable, who will assist me with the billing."

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

"Yes, you do get your bonus today. My assistant is empty the change out of the vending machine as we speak."

NHS targets.

'I think I can solve our budget problem with the color scanner, color laser printer and this twenty-dollar bill!'