Budgeting Expert Pillows

"Son, can you spare a couple of minutes to talk about your tuition?"

Infrastructure Collapse.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

Fuel bill gone through the roof

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

Investing your savings

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"What comes after zillion?"

'Well I've finished the project on time and on budget!' 'Oh, that means I've given you too much time and too much money!'

'We grow our food, have solar energy, use bikes instead of car...now if we could only stop buying knickknacks!'

"This guy might like fiddling with numbers, Dad – but is he any good at sums?"

Blowing dust off an order book.

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"The good news is that profits are up 76%. . . The BAD news is that costs are up 83%."

'I couldn't imagine bringing a child into the current fiscal-cliffy world.'

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

"I hate check writing, but, hey, it pays the bills."

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

"No, unfortunately I won't be raising your debt ceiling."

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

'We've gone over your budget very carefully, Mr Thorne. Unfortunately the network does not sell 7-second spots.'

"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."

Small Businesses Go Under.

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'