Budget Consultant Pillows

"Gee, Dave, a proposal to balance the budget wasn't really what I was expecting."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"Who's got the hammer?"

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

"You need to justify your own existence first."

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

"What comes after zillion?"

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

And this is a little ditty I wrote called 'the third quarters profit and loss account' ...Colin often wished that he'd followed his first love and taken up a career as a musician

'We grow our food, have solar energy, use bikes instead of car...now if we could only stop buying knickknacks!'

'I wonder how the economy is doing.'

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

'We spend a lot, borrow a lot, tax a lot. It keeps things from getting boring.'

"The good news is that profits are up 76%. . . The BAD news is that costs are up 83%."

"Unfortunately the first thing they cut was the stationery budget..."

"This guy might like fiddling with numbers, Dad – but is he any good at sums?"

Keep the econoimy moving

'I couldn't imagine bringing a child into the current fiscal-cliffy world.'

City Finance Dept: My Way/The Highway