Budget-conscious Decorator Pillows

'It's a quote from the builder...he says that the ?8500 will just about cover the cost of him coming over to laugh at us!'

'Maybe it would have been cheaper to just glue money to the wall.'

'You sure we can't afford another ladder?'

"Unfortunately we can't afford to switch them on this year."

Thrifty Christmas.

'Budget Interior decorator'

"I think I found something in our price range!"

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Painting the Ceiling

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

Shelter Cat Nap

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

Potichomania (The art of decorating glass), as carried out by Master Tom in the Easter holidays.

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

"I'm starting to think stripes."

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

Face Painting.

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Michelangelo is painting the Sistine Chapel ceiling and a priest comes to check how he's going - 'Michelangelo, what the hell is that? I just wanted a couple of coats of duck-egg blue!'

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

'Brian's saved us a small fortune...making all our own furniture!'

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

Redecorating Easter Island.

'Quick, press control Z!'

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'