Budget Battle Enthusiast Gifts

'Bring on the Budget!'

Warrior Woman

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

Epic Battles

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

Fries and kids

DIY marriage counseling.

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

'Ooops! My mistake. That was the yearly budget estimate, no the monthly estimate.'

'They never quite finished it - it was probably over budget.'

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

"All I have left to cut is my lunch money."

"I've run every test known to man, and it turns out you're allergic to medical bills."

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

The spend is high

A street fight.

Family planning - 'I was thinking something low maintenance.'

"I'm afraid your allowance didn't survive the latest round of budget cuts."

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

Gas Bill

'Break a leg.' - 'Thanks a lot.'

How to make sure he won't see his shadow.

Fiscal Cliff Dwellers.

"But if we didn't measure things we wouldn't know how good we were at measuring the things that we're measuring!"

Tony Blair - EU budget.

BIBLE STORIES, 'This is full of battle and other BOY stuff - not a single romantic comedy!'

"I don't need one, Gracie. My shopping list is very simple! Things I have a coupon for and things that are on sale!"

Looking for a way to have their cake and eat it too.

'When are you gonna get me some real competition?'

Roman paramedic.

'Haven't they ever heard of walls around here?'

Everyone waited as Allen figured out how much the meal had cost per bite.