Brutal Honesty Admirer Pillows

"Frankly, Mr. Arnold. I'm sick and tired of hearing about your pet turtle."

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"He gets easily abstracted."

'Does this outfit make me look fat?'

"That's Eleanor. She's a fact checker."

'At least he's honest.'

'I always ask that you be frank and let your hair down providing, of course, you ever grow any hair to let down.'

'The 'whole truth and nothing but the truth' can be tricky.'

"It pains me to tell you this, but it ain't broke."

"Normally this is where I would say something funny but the cartoonist is quiet quitting, too."

"Maybe you should be depressed, your life isn't that great."

"Donny's just going through a brutalist phase."

'Oh no, not another blood sample.'

The Very Best of JOHN DOE

'What does my dad do? Anything Mum tells him.'

"To be honest we can't afford to be honest."

'Why honest is the best policy...'

'What is it about 'Please, Dad, I beg of you' that you don't understand? FYI, my best friend Amanda's dad didn't chicken out.'

Introducing Honest Abe Cards

"...And I'd like to thank all the little people whom I stepped on in order to get to where I am..."

The Street Kid at Christmas.

Dracula's false teeth

Damnation without relief means there is no Ladies Room.

'Joe's Junk Food.' 'At least he's honest.'

'Your resume says, you are lazy, stupid, incompetent, useless, and a nitwit. You're hired, I like an honest man.'

Dolphin at bar - 'I'm in disguise'

(Can't) Count Dracula.

"I find it difficult to like him. He's too good at being humble."

"Thank you for calling the honesty foundation, your call in unimportant to us, so leave a message for us to laugh at when you hear the tone..."

'When I asked for your honest opinion of me, I didn't expect you to be THAT honest!'

Vampire's postman.

"I'm a do-gooder, Maggie. It's not easy."

The Cheshire cat meets the Cheshire dog.