Browsing Buff Pillows

"No thanks, just browsing."

'Just look'in'

ANTIQUES: Buyers and Lookers

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Television Readers.

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

Audio Books

'Yes, all at once!'

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

The discovery of asparagus.

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

Obsession with the Internet.

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

Myths and legends...

Moby Dick

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

Of Mice and Men.

"Tonight we are going out to plunder, lads!"

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

Tunnel of TV

Homo Zapiens

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

Caption Contest TK

Fifty shades of Leveson.

'Look man, no wings!'