Broth Philosopher Pillows

"The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

'I've stepped on so many people for the last 20 years to get where I'm at, and I'm still only a middle manager.'

"I don't know...sometimes I think I don't spend enough time with them. What kind of role model am I?"

'How about we just sit here a while to regulate the gaps in our service?..'

"May I offer a very different scenario?"

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"I consider every member of our family to be like family."

"The good news is we've used up all our bad ideas."

'Perkins, you really know to suck the joy out of a 3rd quarter report.'

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

'Will I have to be a mum when I grow up?'

'As chairman, that's my opinion. I propose we table any motion to further discuss this matter. All those in favor say 'aye'. All those opposed say 'bye'.'

'That's true son..Money can't buy happiness. But it makes being unhappy a little easier to live with.'

"I'd go with French Impressionist. It evokes the burnished golds of autumn leaves and the bittersweet regrets of lost love. It's also on special."

"We want to include you in this decision without letting you affect it."

"Is this a bad time for our feedback meeting?"

"Why does it always have to represent something?"

"Why is our company always at the back of the wagon train?"

"Remember, when they go low... we observe shareholder value and act accordingly."

Boring Board Meeting

"I yip, therefore I am."

'The fourth quarter was no walk in the park. Especially for those who count on us to walk in the park.'

'Gentlemen we need more growth.'

'It's time you learned, son - in-laws and outlaws aren't necessarily opposites.'

"Life isn't fair, and that's what makes it fun."

'But APART from increased profitability, better customer support, enhanced margins, reduced stress and improved staff morale WHAT is the POINT of all this emphasis on increased PRODUCTIVITY?'

'I'm important to note we really are trying hard.'

Starving Philosophy student grappling with the question of the toast in the machine.

"I'll grip but I won't grin."

'How do you want your eggs, too hard or too soft?'

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'