Broadcasting Wizard Gifts

John Humphreys

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

WiFi Signals

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

'Herb will provide one of his concise interpretations of the quarterly sales charts.'

Aladdin conjures up a virtual genie.

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

Change Management: Change can be ruf.

Traffic Management Strategic Group

"Good old Frank. He was always thinking of others."

'This is Martins, the office I was telling you about. She's got a real knack for texting people down from window ledges!'

'I can beat my own drum but it'll be counting on your to toot my horn.'

Sports Radio in Crisis

A souped up car...

A bar selling 'crafty' beer is more popular than a bar selling 'craft' beer.

'I can't wait for Power Point.'

"No, it hasn't anything to do with my presentation. But wait until you see how I hold everyone's attention with it sitting next to me at the podium."

"Now the first thing you have to do is to get a client's attention."

"Recent research has yielded some frightening results...It turns out we are a business team held forever on a presentation chart, locked away in a supply closet."

This reader asks, "Dear Dr. Ernie, is it true that most people need to improve their listening skills?" Sure, I enjoy the glistening hills.

'First the good news.'

"I'm feeling a lot of love in the room - with the exception of that guy over there."

"When did this game get started?"

"Miss. Wilcox, get me the coast."

"Nothing beats work events to mingle, build relationships, and backstab fellow colleagues."

Executive MFA

"I didn't think much of the plot, but I like the product placement."

The Town Tweeter

"Eat those veggies or I'll change the wifi password."

"Have you tried powerpoint?"

'Wi-fi-fo-fum! I smell the blood of an Englishman!'

The director said 'cut'!

"My therapist says you have to at least meet me half way."

'I wonder if TED ever listens.'