Bridge Whiz Gifts

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

The first car accident.

"You keep impeccable time."

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

Paper to boy: 'Did you forget something? I'm your take home test.'

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

The Invention of the Wheel

This is Twig's scene. Get ready! That's her! Where? There! Too late. Nice shot of Jessie Caldwell. Wasn't she fabulous.

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'I need both hands for steering.'

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

'Hey! -- I invented that, too!', 'It's that nut Al-Gor again.'

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

Pollsters

Exit 89. Why don't you ask for directions? You're no roads scholar!

First Speeding Fine.

Millipede motorist

Um... Can I get an 'L', Pat?

"Bangin’ rims. Sears?"

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

"Maybe we should stop making them on a hill."

The Best Defense for Trump's Wall

"'Thank you for sending us your manuscript,' she exclaimed. 'You're welcome,' I retorted. 'Unfortunately, it's not what we are looking for,' she opined. 'How disappointing,' I remarked."

"Can you believe English isn't the official language here?"

"Yes, my automatic starter has the technology to start your car as well. I'll show you. Honey! Go start her car!"

Publication Day for Johnson's Dictionary

"Hardscrabble"

'We had to discontinue the alphabet soup -- we were getting too many libel suits.'

"I realise children are learning to use computers at an early age, but this is outrageous!"

'I invented them yesterday and Junior already has them souped up.'