Brewery Launch Gifts

"C'mon, speed it up!"

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

Best Before 5th Pint.

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

Bright Idea

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

Boom

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

'We'll take it!'

'We get our draft straight from the brewery.'

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'

Bottle Distillery

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

'Is this your first book launch?'

"I've read all your books and seen all your plays, and I wear your 'Gimme' cap."

'Malty tasking.'

Fount of eternal youth/brewery.

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

'Well,we had a good run.' - Worldwide Hops Shortage.

"So much for that vintage!"

"Thousands of craft beers and I still haven't found one with a smooth, kibble finish."

'Well, it was just a first draft.'