Breakfast Bard Gifts

Toastquest!

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

Lady of the bath...

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

Have you got your make up on yet?

"And this little piggy went – whoa! Where is your fifth little piggy?!"

'Insofar as hard figures are still unavailable, our Mr.Rendleman has written a poem which explores the essence of the firm's situation.'

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Bill just does celebrity cook-books these days, that's where the real money is."

Gullib-Os

"In every situation, an executive has to decide whether to lead by consensus, charisma or cattle prod. Trust me... it's not always this easy!"

'Okay darlin' if you need more whipped cream just hit the red button.'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"Yes, I know, Munger. But Wallace Stevens didn't scribble his damned verses on company time."

"I'm enhancing my appreciation for the knowledge gathered by humankind."

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

'How do you want your eggs, too hard or too soft?'

"You'd like a book by Shakespeare? Certainly sir - which one. . .?"

Samuel Pepys' writer's block

"Take your time. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

Missing sock

'They are poached eggs, sir -- we grabbed them when the chicken wasn't looking!'

'But you distinctly said working breakfast.'

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."

Bagel problems.

'And here on our left you see the sugary cereal aisle...a real crowd pleaser!'

'I miss the rarefied atmosphere of Mt. Olympus.'

Credit Crunch: Breakfast for Losers.