Break Room Dweller Gifts

'It appears the best way to be politically correct is to be apolitical.'

"My email is down... talk to me."

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

'These are job perks.'

'Bad luck duck - he's on your side of the bed.'

'Would you all please congatulate...'

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

'Right about here I added a drip coffee maker, with high caffeine premium blend coffee, to the employee break room.'

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

"Whoa! One last doughnut left."

Student Food Pyramid

"Remember, son, no matter what happens to you, we intend to always keep your room at home exactly as it is right now...empty."

"I think somebody thinks I've been away from my desk too long."

Room-mate Homicides Waiting to Happen. . .

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

Biting Slippers.

Tomorrow's another day, he thought, unless I get lucky and sleep right through it.

Isn't that a surveillance camera?

"This next song is for all the music teachers who said I'd never make it."

Time stood still – which made it an easy target.

"It's the break room, Ed. There are people in there, too. I know it's hard, after all that time working from home, but you're going to have to start getting used to them again."

"Are we there yet?"

Colin's GPS was to prove useless at finding Maureen's 'G' spot.

"Johnson, what are you doing? It's not time for your break yet."

Drinks: Tea, Coffee, Choco, Scalded Leg, Wet Shoe, Half a Cup, No Cup.

'I pretend to work.They pretend to pay me!'

'I think it's time we got rid of the espresso maker.'

"I can never find any change here."

'I've worked out your pro rated holiday leave on the basis that you only put in a couple of hours real work a day.'

Looks like a nice day out...virtually speaking.

"Joey, are you on break again?"

Using a Snow Blower in Dorm Room.

'Well. . . my first year of college is going okay, but I really wish I could get some new roommates.'

"...and as an added perk, our break room is full of stuff your wife won't let you eat."

"Ralphie sold me his car alarm."