Boxing Announcer Gifts

'Excuse me. Is this seat 27c?'

A young Don King

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"Let's consider an early dive."

Nun Fight.

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Muhammad Ali publishes a popup book.

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

Trainer: I'll warn you now Johnny, don't underestimate this guy. If he gets you into a corner, he'll clean you up.

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

The Boxing Glove Diet was working for Bertram.

Presenter Auditions.

"This just in — I no longer have a job."

Mayo-A-Mayo

Sports Radio in Crisis

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

Caricature of Noam Chomsky

This is great, Ernie, there's a pennant race and the ballpark is packed every day! The food selection here is unmatched anywhere! Today I've already had nachos, a bit of hot dog and some ice cream! Coming here always makes me queasy! Oh, the foods too much for you? No, I just get nervous in a place where the term "sacrifice fly" is used!

Wordplay: Rabbit Punch.

"Don't tell coach about this- he doesn't want us to be friends."

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

"Fielder, did you punch out?"

Boxing gym: get your jabs here

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

"I remember when you used to kiss me under the mistletoe."

'Not today,son-not on Fathers' Day!'

"If PBS announcers did football games." "Let's listen carefully to the quarterback as he scans his options. It appears that the defense seems to want to deter his team from moving the ball forward..." "The fans are making so much noise. I wonder if they know how hard that makes it for the players to concentrate?"

"Hold on - the ref is checking the rule book."