Bovine Humorist Pillows

Stop! Mad cows are forbidden to cross the border!

The Cud Food Guide

'I've told you before: Don't let your tongue touch your nose-ring when it's very cold!'

Cow to business man: 'The neck sack is loaded with moolah. Say hello to your cash cow.'

Grass: We lost some good men today!

Moo! OOM!

Funk Facts:Cows.

"You can achieve anything if you put you mind to it."

Working from home

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

'Jurassic Pork.'

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

Motorherd

"Yes, one is a dog."

Hats and Food

"Scuba cow"

'Roy! For the last time, don't wave that red one in front of your Dad.'

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

No jay walking.

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

"Did you know he'd joined a squirrel watchers club?"

'Bird Watching is fun, but it tends to make me salivate...'

Northeastern Deer/Southwestern Deer