Bouquet Connoisseur Gifts

'Mmm... the bouquet flickers around the nose like butterflies sweetly scented by the shower from a the milk of a goddesses breasts.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

Mr. Punch's Fancy Ball

Dick was the kind of guy who wanted everyone to know it was his birthday.

His Her Cakes

Cake Free Zone

'Guess what I've got for lunch today...a piece of my wife's delicious rum cake.'

Mouse living in a wedding cake.

See, eating healthy isn't so bad...."

"An untested recipe. An uncalibrated oven. Substituted ingredients. And yet, the cake...the cake is...magnificent!"

'Mom's baking finally allowed us to diversify and greatly increase our neighborhood market share.'

Bee costume

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

"That's part of my Quality Control Program."

Doctor Bartolo

I'm worried about Uncle Mort. He's still in jail for refusing to reveal his secret source? Not just that. It's his relationship with Sadie. I feel like … What? She says she wants him back, but I'm not sure. Why would you say something like that? Your sweetie made you a saw with a cake in it. Oooh.

"You're not a real fan. You're just dressed up like a slut for attention."

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

File Cabinets for Perfectionists

'Can I have some of your peanut butter and jelly sandwich? All my mom ever gives me is cake.'

'You're FLIES YOU FOOLS!'

Zoo Society Costume Party. Lot's of people had the same idea --- We're surrounded by fake gnus.

Prenuptial Wedding Cake

"Blessed are they who blow out birthday cakes candles, for they shall be de-lighted."

'You should have ordered one. This is the only one left in the shop!'

A shrink charges $200 an hour, but double chocolate layer cake is only $19.95.

'Aww, mom! Pineapple upside down cake? ...Again?'

"The fancy dress store ran out of crutches."

'It seems with every year my hot flashes get worse.'

Psychologist Birthdays

"Better get two dozen. She won't be able to hit you as hard with both arms full."

'I'm really tired of hearing about her pious children, the angel food cake.'

"Your chocolate birthday cake weighs 10 pounds. The butter frosting is 1 pound the candles weight 2 ounces each. The total weight of the cake is 13 pounds. How old are you?"

Bat