Bottomless Pit Gifts

"You're still eating?"

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

"I need to tinkle."

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'It's supposed to look and smell greasy.'

'In the 20 minutes it took for the pit boss to come back with a comp for the $10 buffet, I lost another $500.'

Bottomless bowl of soup

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

"I now recognize the basement was a bad idea."

"With any entrée, you get unlimited access to the trough."

Ball pit

Jurassic Country Club.

'Your wife borrowed the car.'

"Mom says you are going to play in the sand."

"Bretheren and Sistern out there in Congregational Land!"

'By the time I finish explaining the rules, I've lost 'em.'

And then, right in the middle of a Warrant/Winger double bill, Rob Myers becomes the first person in history to actually have his socks rocked off.

Yet anoher prehistoric mammal is covered up by the La Brea Tarp - never to be seen again.

Race car driver sees Pit crew member holding sign: Stop And Ask For Directions.

"I'm taking you off sugar, carbs, red meat, poultry, dairy, non-dairy and anything served in a bucket."

It was that moment that Pastor Russ realized that it was Saturday.

Leo's Diner, Home of the Bottomless Cup of Coffee

"Ok, so you weren't invited to the tar put party. . . it's not the end of the world, you know!"

'Charlie, you've been dredging your sand from the golf courses again.'

We welcome your urine

'I don't care where you lost your yarmulke, if you don't find it I'm not bringing you here again.'

He's rehearsing his sermon. Ah, practicing what he preaches.

"Mom, Dad's in my sand pit again."

Joe Manchin gets the one thing worse than coal this year.

'I can't believe we forgot to pack the car.'

"Ohhhhhhhhhh, I see. When I saw the sign out front, I just assumed it meant advice."

Pit of Death