Bottle Savorer Gifts

'It keeps leftover wine fresh? Does that ever happen?'

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

Pasta

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

Women who Read Too Much

'You know full well, your gastric band won't work if you keep eating spaghetti like that!'

Two lemons enjoying some reading time together in their 'Home Sour Home'.

Garlic, the wonderful stinking rose.

"Keep a television remote zapper handy along with a bottle of scotch whisky."

Oysters in June - delicious!

"Here's Bill now. I'm not sure where he's been, but I'm guessing it was the Sour Beer Festival."

Bottle Bank. . .

Quick gin. Sloe gin

"The water tastes great because it contains sea salt."

'May I recommend the monk fish, sir?

'This wine doesn't need to breathe...it needs CPR!'

Fishing Quota - "Oh no! We've gone over the limit."

"Yes, the steaks have never been higher."

'If you're in a hurry, why did you order the snails?'

'Ta da! A preview of coming extractions!'

A people-meter family out enjoying the calm night breezes while claiming to be inside enjoying a rerun of 'Falcon Crest.'"

For the grey nomad, life on the road had its challenges.

Conveyor belt sushi

'What makes him a wine snob? - He knows more than I do.'

"The end is near, now available on Amazon Prime."

"Quick! It's the 45 minutes a year when tomatoes taste incredible!"

"I'm not blowing to cool it down, I'm trying to warm it up!"

"There's nothing like coiling up with a good book."

The Specials