Bottle Philosopher Pillows

'This wine is liberal bordering on the reckless. Bring me something more capitalist.'

"The champagne aisle always makes me cry. Just look at all this imprisoned happiness!"

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'You lifted your head.'

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Playdough's The Republic

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'This test doesn't understand me.'

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Men gossiping

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

I think I can, I think I can ... therefore I think I am...

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

ONE HORSE TOWN

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

A young positivist.