Beer Philosopher Pillows

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

"So, Ben, what do you want to be when you stop sponging off your parents?"

'Why did God create alcohohol?'

'Muriel told me that men are all alike - That's kind of reassuring, actually.'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

"Have you noticed that as we get older it only takes a couple of pints before we start talking bollocks?'

"Hunting's okay, but by gathering grain, I can make beer!"

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

Beer Stall

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

Men gossiping

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

ONE HORSE TOWN

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'