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Hard to Reach Books.

'...and what's more, they're all first editions.'

Moby Poppins

"Maybe you could put the bad girlfriend doll in the attic and set her on fire."

City Library: "Oh-oh - I left 'Left behind' behind!"

"You're going to hate yourself."

Jack London

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

"The next song was sixties anthem for the youth subculture of revolution, anarchy and anti-establishment...and can now be heard in elevators worldwide."

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

'Hard to follow...'

CHANNEL THIRTEEN TAKES ON THE NETWORKS

I downloaded Thoreau's "Civil Disobedience" into it's memory, and now the "command" key isn't working.

Plagiarism by Billy Widmore It was the best of times it was the worst of times. Four score and seven years ago, Quoted the raven nevermore...

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

'Bront?saurus.'

The Grapes of Wrath finally get some professional help.

Litteratti K9s.

Book Worm

'We know it's good...we had an excellent ghost writer.'

"I'm afraid we're going to have to remove your appendix."

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

"You'd like a book by Shakespeare? Certainly sir - which one. . .?"

Will Self deprecation

"Friday, YOU were my Secret Santa?"

Cat reading Rommel biography.

The Farmer Sutra.

N't. Dear, we're commas. Get down here before you get hurt.

' Sheesh! I think people are getting tired of hearing those fables of Aesop's

"What a success! We've sold all our copies. You're a great team! Let's go for beer, pizza and crisps - my treat!"

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

Meet The Ghostwriter

'I want something by Anais Nin... but not the naughty Anais Nin!'

"No, no, that's my copy of 'Being and Time'—look at the teeth marks along 'Heidegger'."