Book Banter Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I didn't read your book, or see the movie, but my mother-in-law told me all about it!'

Victor Hugo

Reading my Critics

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"I try to write a little bit every day."

'What worried me most is identity theft.'

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

'Meet the author with her collaborators'

'Sorry, Marx, but your writing ability doesn't meet our needs.'

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

'It'll never work. I'm reading 'Of Mice And men' and you haven't even gotten through 'If You Give A Mouse A Cookie,.'

Graffiti artists signs his memoirs in bookshop.

'According to this, you owe $57.32 in late fees for the book 'Getting By on a Shoestring Budget'.'

So You've Cloned Yourself

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

Meet the author

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

"There goes our early night."

"You'd be angry, too, if your alter ego was a successful physician."

Plagiarism by Billy Widmore It was the best of times it was the worst of times. Four score and seven years ago, Quoted the raven nevermore...

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

"We'd like to publish it, do nothing to promote it, and watch it disappear from the shelves in less than a month."

"In this one, references to everything have been deleted."

'Do you have this in a smaller size?'

Learn yourself English.