Bonus Banker Pillows

'He earns less than the Prime Minister...'

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

The Evolution of the Bonus

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

'Ready for your bonus, Bob?'

'But the good news is, I still get a big bonus.'

"It drives me MAD when people whine about the amount top management get paid. . ."

'Remember Nitro, keep the engine running and once we've bagged the bonus cheques you floor the peddle.'

'I chose here since heaven won't allow you to take your bonus and golden parachute with you.'

"At bonus time, just don't forget where you get your intellectual property."

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'

'I think the global banking sector, drunk on years of excessive bonuses, may need a little more than your 'very angry' T-shirt to make them toe the line.'

'Tell me more about the obscene bonus package.'

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

We don't think your 12 million dollar bonus is obscene. We think it's 12 million little ways to say 'I love you.'

The ground cracking beneath a banker's feet because his bonus is so big and heavy.

'I've got my wallet here in the left inside pocket. Now I got a bonus and bought a bigger wallet which needs more space. Would you please remove my heart?'

"No Jenkins, that's NOT a sales graph - it's my salary increase."

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

loan

'$800,000 per year? Is that with or without an incentive bonus?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

'You're addicted to big bonuses. But the good news is there's a patch to treat that.'

"I've been too busy investing my enormous salary to be bothered running the company."

"You've been vital to our great year. Your bonus is whatever you can carry out by midnight."

"Will my bonus look big in this?"

'We're with you half way, sir. We'll return our government bailout if we can keep our executive bonuses.'

'I'd like a job where I'm hated for having obscene amounts of money.'

"If I don't get a bonus from my bank, I'll quit and flip burgers!"

'We're a paperless office - except for executive bonuses.'

CEO Incentives

"The government wants us to wear these bonus hazard suits."

'Getting a big bonus to risk other people's money makes me wonder if I am part of a conspiracy.'