Body Transformation Dreamer Gifts

House of Mirrors

'I'm going to soak for three days, then Andre here is going to sculpt me into an entirely new body shape with the pumice stone.'

Pampered and poodled.

Sleepwalker on treadmill

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be?" "I’d totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body." "That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000." "Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he’s concerned about his mortality. Your answer should have been 'nothing.'" "The alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy." "I think I’d rather wait for the 7000–S." "Stop it."

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

Complete Makeover

James's Mayfair Gym - Punting Machine.

'...but you can't keep imagining you're going downhill!'

Built and Built without a permit.

A tailor measuring a large man

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

"My dad's been on my case...he says I should be preparing for my future career. But what kind of training can I get here for a job that's tough, will make tons of money and highlight my incredible bod?"

Cinderella

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

'I seem to have lost the body I had before I had children.'

Two men, one with his abdomen outside his trousers, the other with it inside. 'The Tummy Tuck.'

Well there's something you don't see every day...

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

Metamorphosis is coming.

'This is weird - there's a thin person inside me, TEXTING to get out.'

'Have you considered reinventing yourself?'

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

Workout Calendar

"I need to get back in the gym."

'It's really not that effective, but it's easy to store.'

I resolve to drive past a gym at least twice a week

Out of condition man in front of mirror which makes him look slim.

'He's training for the London Marathon,he watches it every year.'

"I'm inspired to try to run a marathon."

Healthy Eating Fast

'You get the diet book which you won't read, the exercise bar you won't use and the workout CD which you won't watch, for only $29.99.'

How much for rock-hard abs? $200 for a basic six-pack, includes high-intensity training sessions. Lemme think about it. I'll be here. What's going on? The new year's resolutions are trickling in. You're working as a physical trainer now? I got into resolution outsourcing. What? People pay me to fulfill their resolutions. They vow to get in shape, or stop procrastinating, or be more honest about their feelings. I take on the task and then they check it off their list. I know what you're thinking