Body Positivity Champ Gifts

Ohne Worte

"Of course you don't look fat."

'I'm on my weigh!'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

Critisize your weight.

"Privates Beach"

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

Breast Height Chart

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

'I gotta lose some weight.'

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

"That's a big fat lie!"

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Aging Problems

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

"When you're healed, I'm going to wear it so I can't see what I weigh."

'Here's your chance to become a legend.'

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

'Call Me Old-Fashioned, But I Liked It Better When They Didn't Shave Their Armpits.'

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

Fat fairy