Body Positive Ambassador Gifts

'Holding in your stomach won't help, sir.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

Critisize your weight.

"Privates Beach"

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

Breast Height Chart

'I gotta lose some weight.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

I have to get the Positive Thinker...

"That's a big fat lie!"

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

"When you're healed, I'm going to wear it so I can't see what I weigh."

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Aging Problems

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

'Call Me Old-Fashioned, But I Liked It Better When They Didn't Shave Their Armpits.'

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

Girl's weight issues.

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

Fat fairy

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

Scales