Body Positive Ambassador Pillows

'Holding in your stomach won't help, sir.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

Critisize your weight.

"Privates Beach"

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

Breast Height Chart

'I gotta lose some weight.'

I have to get the Positive Thinker...

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"That's a big fat lie!"

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

Aging Problems

"When you're healed, I'm going to wear it so I can't see what I weigh."

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

'Call Me Old-Fashioned, But I Liked It Better When They Didn't Shave Their Armpits.'

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

Fat fairy

Girl's weight issues.

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

In the not too distant future... "It's a tribal butterfly tramp stamp, honey. Same as yours."

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.