Body Positive Advocate Pillows

'Distorted self image.'

'What are YOU looking at?!'

"I used to hate my body. Now, instead, I hate the forces that conspire to make me hate my body."

'Don't worry, Mom. . . there could never be too much of you.'

"I developed so fast I learned the alphabet from my cup size."

Full Fat, Half Fat, Virtually Fat Free.

"Well, okay. Let's suppose that it's normal for your unborn baby to be three stone. You'd still be 18lbs overweight."

"... Okay, but if the pregnancy test comes back negative, then can I have some slimming pills?"

A woman imagines growing a beard.

'Mom what is wrong with that woman's waist?'

"Does this dress make me look fat?"

Scales

Self-concept of a weight watcher.

Man standing on weighing scales in his bathroom

Dress Size Negative One.

'What happened mom? I thought you were on a low-carb diet?'

Woman and scales.

"Honey, do these jeans make me look fat?"

'I think they're still just sizing each other up.'

I'm sorry, they don't make dresses large on the inside and small on the outside!

Wearing bras in 2020.

"Lockdown won't flatten these curves."

"You think they're real?"

"I came into this world naked and ugly and I'm still naked and ugly."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

Critisize your weight.

"Privates Beach"

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

Breast Height Chart

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."