Body Language Observer T-Shirts

"My eyes are up here, Mr. Buckley."

"Why did you just blink?"

"In the interest of safety when alighting the train, avoid eye contact..."

"Welcome aboard. We will endeavor to treat you with dignity and respect. Now get you and your stupid face out of my office."

Dog Park / Cat Park

"Say, when did you get so fluff?"

"It says here that humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can have sex any time, any place."

'The usual ‘nod, nod, wink, wink' will do, Walter. We don't need the eyebrow twitch and nostril flares.'

"I'm fascinated by body language."

Feline Stand Up - 'Fetching...how dumb is that? And another thing I don't understand...what's with all that TAIL WAGGING?'

'It's almost as if they knew!'

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

"You're overthinking it. Sometimes a belly rub is just a belly rub."

The life of penguins.

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

Wonders of evolution: Same face, totally different meaning.

Body Language - "Guess why I'm annoyed."

Hyenas as Pets

The revenge of Russell

"Fuhgettaboutit, Charley. Ya been fixed."

"Teach me not to care."

These young people need everything spelled out to them! I miss the old days, when a wink was a wink, and a nod was a nod.

"I'm afraid this whole experiment is about to go south."

'When you approach a customer, don't have your hands in your pockets.'

FISH ESCAPE.

"It's all the rage at court but I doubt it will catch on. He calls it power posing. . .!"

A Cat about to smash into a Goldfish Aquarium for a meal.

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

"They say this will keep us up all night like that's a bad thing."

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

John Kerry making a speak: 'What'd he say?'

"My conclusion that he lied was based on his body language, his polygraph results, and the complete implausibility of his story."

"Bad dog!"

Sooner or later, 'These trying times' become 'The good ol' days'.'