Boardroom Baby Gifts

"Get me the coast.

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

"Listen to everybody's opinions? Please, we're not that desperate."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

'As I see it, our choices are 'no' and 'hell no'.'

'Well, I'm not very satisfied with our customers, either.'

"I've decided to add a little magic, so, everyone, say hello to my little friend."

Acme Toys Ltd

'You myst blow at least a 2.3 on the 'drunk with power' breathalizer before they'll promote you to upper management.'

'Interesting. At first, I didn't pick her as dominant.' - Child chairs meeting at Toys Inc.

'At that point the meeting became chaotic, as everyone's medication seemed to wear off at the same time.'

"I made my money the old fashioned way...a team of high priced lawyers litigating round the clock."

Our parent company is not pleased with our work. They want all of us to register for a few remedial MBA courses.

'Whose idea was it to use enron as a benchmark?'

'Drop dead. Well that's good start to our negotiations.'

'I'm sure you all agree that this has been a very constructive meeting.'

"I see you've come a long way, Perkins."

'We were able to make a quick alliance together because of common insecurities.'

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

"I'd rather be at the office."

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

"Irma, cancel all my appointments for the next 3 weeks, I need to go home to brood. Tell the board to only contact me on my mobile phone..."

"So we actually can agree on something...rolled sleeves, loose ties, and no jackets!"

Paul exhibits a classic symptom of Attention-Surplus Disorder.

'Benson will you stop trying to dominate the meeting.'

I'm just saying he picked a hell of a time to have a Susan Boyle moment.

'I've never had to butter up the boss. I've always been the boss.'

"Never forget he's a wild animal."

'At our last meeting we decided to go for broke. Well, mission accomplished.'