Boardroom Baby Gifts

"Get me the coast.

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

"Listen to everybody's opinions? Please, we're not that desperate."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

'As I see it, our choices are 'no' and 'hell no'.'

'Well, I'm not very satisfied with our customers, either.'

Acme Toys Ltd

"I've decided to add a little magic, so, everyone, say hello to my little friend."

'You myst blow at least a 2.3 on the 'drunk with power' breathalizer before they'll promote you to upper management.'

'Interesting. At first, I didn't pick her as dominant.' - Child chairs meeting at Toys Inc.

Our parent company is not pleased with our work. They want all of us to register for a few remedial MBA courses.

"I made my money the old fashioned way...a team of high priced lawyers litigating round the clock."

'At that point the meeting became chaotic, as everyone's medication seemed to wear off at the same time.'

'Whose idea was it to use enron as a benchmark?'

'Drop dead. Well that's good start to our negotiations.'

'I'm sure you all agree that this has been a very constructive meeting.'

'We were able to make a quick alliance together because of common insecurities.'

"I see you've come a long way, Perkins."

"So we actually can agree on something...rolled sleeves, loose ties, and no jackets!"

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

"Irma, cancel all my appointments for the next 3 weeks, I need to go home to brood. Tell the board to only contact me on my mobile phone..."

Paul exhibits a classic symptom of Attention-Surplus Disorder.

Butterfly Sales

"I'd rather be at the office."

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

'Benson will you stop trying to dominate the meeting.'

'I've never had to butter up the boss. I've always been the boss.'

If John Lennon had gone into strategic management.

I'm just saying he picked a hell of a time to have a Susan Boyle moment.

"Never forget he's a wild animal."