Blurb Aficionado T-Shirts

"My jacket blurbs used to have such conviction, he thought to himself wistfully."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

'Wow, talk about genius!'

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'

'Nice, but it needs more angst.'

"Outré or simply bad?"

"Want to find out if you're also king of the swamp?"

Boardroom sacrifice - 'Then we agree - the shareholders don't have to know what transpired here today.'

Corporate Darwinism

'This is the painting he was about to start when he shot himself.'

"A conundrum, rather than an outright mess, I think, Mrs Ellis..."

"When it comes to good, old-fashioned roots music, this guy is the BEST!"

'You're no Pollock.'

Blind mammal Johnson....part animal, all blues man!

Jackson Pollock makes a mistake: 'Guess I'll have to start over.'

"Not succinct or to the point Ambrose...just how we like it!"

"Is this 'pollocks'."

"I don't get it. We use condoms!"

Slim, a blues guitarist, was taking his meds again.

"It's a cautionary tale about why we shouldn't cut arts funding in schools."

"Is that all you can say - 'It's not messy'?"

"The tricky bit is finding some UK infrastructure that's working to switch it off."