Black Sheep Of The Family Gifts

"This is your second cousin Armando. He was an artist."

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"Bad dog."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

"Static cling."

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

'You're suffering from job-stress insomnia. Stop counting sheep to fall asleep.'

'We'll take it!'

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

"Any qualifications other than speaking the language."

The Uterus in the form of a Ewe

"He wants a second opinion."

A cow ventriloquist.

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

Sheepdog Security

'Follow the crowd! Do what the other sheep do! Gad, child, why can't you remember that?'

Lambo

Sheep with its wool unwinding because it's snagged on a tree

God builds the first lawn mower.

Dog watching show called, 'After Obedience School Special'

'I'm warning you, don't come any closer! I'm fully charged with static electricity!'

'Yeah, they're neat tattoos, but they're only visible at shearing time each year...'

'The black sheep of the flock,'

Wool jumpers: Meet the author

'Let's go and lean against one of the vibrators.'

'Go on and have fun, I'll keep an eye on him...'

"I hate my new job: The flock has two rather troublesome blacksheep..."

Em-Eews: Emus and Ewes in the form of each other.

"I don't see myself as just a dog. I see myself as a Complete Family Pet System."

'That's all you care? The first time you see me sheared you want out?'

'I've thought the same thing myself. He certainly doesn't look like any of us.'