Bird Feeder Fans Pillows

"Liberals!"

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Raptures

Yoyo sheep

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

Marcel Marceau's parrot

'All she said was something about having rice for dinner and then poof!. . . She's gone!'

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

"Pass that."

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

"I'm an ass is half-full kind of donkey."

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

U.S. Farm Production: Cup Runneth Over.

'I got the job, Mom. You always said I'd make a living with my hands.'

Free Range Eggs - ""I've decided to sell up. I'm having trouble making hens meet."

"One of your delicious ducks got into my yard yesterday."

'Is it true you're covered in genuine pigskin?'

"Sprechen ze MOO MOO?"

'Look...it's almost empty! Those pesky birds need to quit stealin' the food out of this squirrel feeder!'

'Ouch! I'm glad I didn't lay him.'

"We raise our beef humanely."