Biology Researcher Gifts

"Fascinating. The rats choose chocolate nine times out of ten, but they always feel guilty about it later."

"I know the rules on cloning, but it's easier to ask forgiveness than ask permission."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

The Jeopardy of Progress

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

2021

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Circa 1928, The Reese's Candy laboratory.

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

Fear/Knowledge

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

UK/US Free Trade Deal

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

Burning the midnight oil.