Biological Humorist Gifts

'My student had the hiccups...'

You're right. If we remove the appendix without rearranging the other organs, his feng shui will be shot.

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

"What do you get if you insert human DNA into a goat?"

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

'Teenagers!'

The Solar System (after deregulation)

'Go on, Andy, it's high time anteaters learned size isn't everything!'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

Deer Season Open.

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

"Yes, one is a dog."

'Jurassic Pork.'

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

Hats and Food

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

'That's one hell of a cat-flap Harry. You must have a big cat, heh, heh.'

Try me/try me/try me...

"Scuba cow"

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

When bacteria trash talk to antibodies. Oh yeah?! You and what course of antibiotics?!

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

"Get out of my face!"