Biography Collector Gifts

'How could a man who seduced a hundred and thirty-two women find the time to write a twelve-volume memoir?'

Misery lit...

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Kanya West Inspired Children Books.

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'A is for Arse.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

What do you say we team up to star in a sequel to "The Elephant Man" called "The Wolverine Boy"? !

"It's Doris Kearns Goodwin. Is there anything we'd like to know about the Presidency?"

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'Once upon a time there was a really lousy editor name Sue. Sue was lazy and stupid, so she was fired, and her boss lived happily ever after. The end.'

"Arianna Stassinopoulos Huffington should write a book about you!"

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"I have an app for that."

'It's Dick Cheney's biography.'

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

You trip on it, you buy it.

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

'Sounds like it'll flop.'

Home Sweet Second Home.

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"No, I don't think I have a book in me. I think I have a chicken in me."

"My Aunt Agatha – feminist, civil rights activist, philanthropist, sound engineer for 'Cheap Trick at Budokan.'"

Pile of books for sale with sign: Expired Fifteen-Minutes-of-Fame Books.

'Be careful! She loves to curl up by the fire with a good author!'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I wouldn't read that book, dear... it's only there to impress visitors."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."