Biography Collector Pillows

'How could a man who seduced a hundred and thirty-two women find the time to write a twelve-volume memoir?'

Misery lit...

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'A is for Arse.'

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"It's Doris Kearns Goodwin. Is there anything we'd like to know about the Presidency?"

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'It's Dick Cheney's biography.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"Arianna Stassinopoulos Huffington should write a book about you!"

"I have an app for that."

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"No, I don't think I have a book in me. I think I have a chicken in me."

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"My Aunt Agatha – feminist, civil rights activist, philanthropist, sound engineer for 'Cheap Trick at Budokan.'"

You trip on it, you buy it.

Home Sweet Second Home.

Pile of books for sale with sign: Expired Fifteen-Minutes-of-Fame Books.

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

'Be careful! She loves to curl up by the fire with a good author!'

Man reading 'Bankruptcy for Dummies'.

The old fashioned, never say die author: 'All right, if they're remaindered, I'll sign the remainders.'

"Pecos Bildungsroman"

The Author's Family - First edition, second edition, third edition...