Bill Shock Survivor Pillows

'And you say your face after you looked at the bill I sent you for your last visit.'

Man dismayed at his mobile phone bill. Sign on his gate reveals the name of his house is 'Dun Global Roamin''

"All natural snow cones for sale."

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

"Great God Almighty! Somebody please wake me up and tell me I'm only dreaming that the chicken marsala costs a whopping twenty-eight ninety-five!"

In case of stock market crash break glass.

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

Bus Stop

The only way I can get through a nudist convention.

"When even the abominable snowman has had enough, its time for us to turn back."

Flights suspended snowstorm

'Uh yeah, it's supposed to be like that... it's a... it's a new invention.'

Trading Places.

'A telemarketing call for you, Sir.'

"Still snowing upstate?"

Jasper wasn't used to dealing with snowstorms before winter, let alone before Halloween...

"Your 'businessman's lunch' was $9.95, sir, but I had to add a 'fair share' surcharge."

It's been awhile, so to refresh your memory - what you need in your car for winter snowstorms...

Duel Fuel?

'Call the office, I'm starting my vacation today.'

Back in 5 Minutes.

Snot-Freezing Cold Grips the North Country...

'I'm switching to another provider,dear.'

"If I can reach that cabin, I'll be saved."

Shoveling Snow

Swing in the winter.

Mr. Winter blast returns.

"Your bill includes a 10% surcharge that goes towards raising awareness of the rampant overcharging in the legal fraternity."

'If this is the start of a new Ice Age, we are in big trouble.'

'Some things you just accept when you move to San Andreas.'

Coffee cup lids that don't fit properly and then dribble dwon the front of your best outfit just before the big meeting.

'If you can hear me headmaster, I want to know why you have closed the school.'