Bike Mechanic Gifts

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

"You say the seat needs to be raised."

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

"Sorry, but that's a road racing bike. I'm a mountain bike specialist."

Drool Marks

Touring Cyclist

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

You had me at vintage.

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

Turmoil change.

'I did not say there was a miss in the motor, I said the motor was missing.'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

A souped up car...

Biker At Museum

Animals are smarter than we think!

"If they can rig emissions tests, why can't they fake crash tests too?"

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

"This says Hispanic life expectancy has risen to 80 years."

Car robbers foiled by mousetraps surrounding a car.

"Turn down the bass."

"Don't worry Doctor. We expect your car to make a full recovery."

Woman finds sensitive mechanic to date.

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

"See that dog, Mr. Hendricks? That means you either have a shredded fan belt or your fuel pump is sucking air."

'I understand you work on foreign models?'

Family Sidecar

'Awesome!'

'Well, if I have a short circuit, just lengthen it.'

A man with a deflated bicycle stands in line at the tire inflator.

Female parking space