Bike Crash Survivor Gifts

"I figured out why your car was pulling to the right."

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

Gary turns 40.

Barbeque Casualty.

Piano and Pianist with broken legs.

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

"Coffee...Cigarettes...Bubble gum..."

'Oh, that's just great. It's not bad enough I'm stranded here. Now I'm trapped in an invisible box.'

"Sell my stock in ACME cruise lines, then get me out of here!"

A man with a rake on a desert island

"I see you do all your own stunts."

Sporting maladies.

"Miss Jones, cancel my 3:30pm"

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

In case of stock market crash break glass.

Warning: Cathartic manifestations of childhood trauma next 5 miles

'You've got a broken finger.'

'...And in case of program crashes, this model comes fully equipped with an air bag!'

"Deputy, round up a posse, I can't find my phone."

'Look on the bright side - Our investments with Bernie Madoff must REALLY be paying off by now!'

'Bloody plaster of Paris.'

Desert Island Bagpipes

"I got knocked down while jogging in heavy traffic."

Sinking cruise ship, with band member saved by floating on cello.

Sling

'What luck! Just the doctor I was going to refer you to.'

"You will be pleased to know that the children said sorry!"

"I just feel like a cliche."

Cruise ship's captain complains God didn't save his hat.

"I hope you like sandy beaches, fresh ocean air, and bumper to bumper traffic"

Traffic Jam.