Big Game Observer Gifts

"So, I've heard you call yourself 'King of the Jungle'! Based on what criteria exactly?"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

'That's one heck of a recoil, Bob!'

"That one killed my manservant, it fell on his head while he was vacuuming the carpet."

'I take it this is your first big game hunt?!!'

"It's a turkey vulture, and it's got something big. Honey, where's Delia?"

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

'Now this was a crafty one!'

Sure, Jupiter's the biggest, but I hear he uses Asteroids to build up his bulk!

'I looked into their eyes before I shot them, with my high-powered rifle, from half a mile away.'

'Something tells me we're in a heap of trouble.'

'Why John, I remember you when you were this high.'

"That's the Crab nebula and that's the 'load of dots that don't look like anything much' nebula!"

'Don't hop around a mite disconcerted - dive, and writhe in agony!'

"We're making some real progress, except, of course, you're still holding a gun."

'Would you mind handing me that needle and thread, sir?'

"Yeah, almost didn't make it out of that one."

Yeah, maybe replacing the clay pigeons with clay big game wasn't smart.

'He got game.'

'I hope it's a quick knockout, I'm double parked.'

"If owls are so smart, how come they don't already now who it is?"

A lumberjack chops down a tree

Just preparation for my business trip to Africa next month...

"Wake up, Larry - you're missing the pregame."

"I'm not a scaredy-cat - I'm phobic."

'That was my first ever kill.'

"So I said to the guide, wave your arms to distract him while I aim. Then my gun jammed."

'So, I says shoot him one more time just to be sure. . .'

"And this is one I got in the nusrsery in '34."

England and Germany

"Honestly, Harry, I'll never tease you again for carrying around that elephant gun!"

'Sometimes, sitting in the sandbox like this, I realize I've been a disappointment to my parents.'

I tell you what, the "Great White Hunter" turned even whiter when his gun jammed while I was charging! Boy he can climb trees quickly...