Biblical Pun Lovers Gifts

'Regarding my Sunday sermon which you typed up, Ms. Sims...it's not 'Saddam and Gomorrah'...'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

"He refuses to use these now they've made them gender nonspecific."

"Perhaps if you guys just swam along behind us for a while."

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

"He wants us to start calling him 'Head Honcho'."

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

Hotness

Literate Dogs.

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

It's not a stampede … It's a flash mob!

"Your four-o'clock is here."

Larry's Literary Market.

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"

The static electric eel is very rare.

'You give me goose bumps!'

'It's for my teacher. Do you have one with love spelled right?'

'No, I said put the money in the Caymen Islands.'

"Remember I promised you some fun and games in the bedroom?"

A robber halds up a hair salon with a hairdryer pointed at the customers - 'Hand over all your hair restorer or I'll blow you away!'

Third eye

'As it's Sunday there will be 30 minutes browsing before the service begins.'

No, he's not metamorphosing. He's in a time-out.

Shakespeare originally wrote "Romeo and Juliet" as a comedy.

"Harry Potter and the chamber of obsolete electronics."