Bible Readings Gifts

And Moses climbed the mountain, day and night, searching for some sort of sign from god when suddenly he saw it!

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Moses separating his Laundry.

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"Eat not of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. Its sources have yet to be verified."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

'Yes, all at once!'

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

"I've told you before one at each end!"

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

"It's the Environment's Agency's new H.Q."

KING HEROD INTERROGATES THE WISE MEN TO KNOW BABY JESUS'S WHEREABOUTS

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

Little Known Moments In History

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'No room at the inn, baby born in a manger: It's gonna be a great story to tell at parties...'

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'It wasn't actually written by God. The Lord used holy ghost writers.'