Bible Basher T-Shirts

'We'll need a supreme court or something to interpret these.'

"True, a salary cap on Wall Street may limit the talent pool, but, on the other hand, if they get any more talented we'll all be broke."

"Your mom's not protesting sex and violence on TV...she's taking a stand against those early Christmas ads..."

'Will you stick to the script!!!'

"Help!"

"Wasn't it follow one star to Bethlehem?"

'I just don't understand... We hate the same movies, books, art, music, friends and relatives, and we agree that the world's a hopeless mess. With all that in common, why is our marriage falling apart?'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

Soccer Fans.

"'50 Shades of Grey?' - Oh you mean the 'Guide to Modern Music...'"

"Even Voldemort wouldn't drown a whole planet."

"Most of the apostles can make it but Thomas is doubtful"

Holy Water and Ice Blocks

Jerusalem's Got Talent

'Don't panic Big Guy, I'm just here to cut you down to size.'

"Hahaha! What's wrong Dorky Nerdmire? That's your name isn't it?"

"Genesis" "*The King Gus Version"

Censorship.

This is a new talking copier, you've pushed the wrong button, mutton head!

'The traffic wardens around here are absolute b**tards.'

'Sorry, no carbs.'

'I don't want to read 'Great Books'. Too much pressure.'

"And the rest is history..."

"So kind of him to let us have the guest ark all to ourselves."

"Your bible says disobedient children should be stoned to death. Won't you agree that capital punishment is an improper parenting technique?"

'Ha, water from the sky indeed. What's next, I wonder? Colors in the sky in the shape of an arc? This guy's a real whack job."

After his football career, Bobby 'Header King' Grunz found a satisfying new job.

"I remember when walls weren't so bossy."

'Hey Moses - that's cheating!'