Beverage Appreciation Pillows

"Got any bathtub gin?"

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

Coffee Venn Diagram

"The drought here in California is so bad, we've gone from watering down our wine, to wining down our water."

'No I don't do decaf, soy lattes with a shot of vanilla!'

'What have you got in the way of a Cabernet Sauvignon for people who like Zinfandel when they can't find Merlot?'

'This wine has a 'cheeky' little aroma, Bruce... Unlike that city-slicker's larger!'

'Well, if nothing else, Brad, your wine selection does prove you have a sense of humor.'

'It's the worst part about going from being a wine collector to a wine retailer - I just can't bear to part with any of them!'

'I'll leave it entirely to you...as long as it's a red...for exactly $20...from Napa...made from Merlot...2006 vintage...'

'This coffee tastes like mud.'

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

'Been toying with Bordeaux futures again, have we?'

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

"If I'd wanted to taste strawberries and summer fruits I'd have asked for fruit squash."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"Scotch and water musick."

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'The King of what?'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."