Belly Rub Aficionado Gifts

"Thanks for the walks, tasty treats and rubbing my belly with vigor. I could only love you more if you made my food dish much bigger."

"I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy." "Which part do you miss most?" "Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what TV shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission?" "Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors."

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

"I told you, I can’t scratch your belly right now."

"They rubbed my tummy, chief- I told them everything."

"Pay attention, 'switch it off switch it on again' does not apply to the life support machines."

"Belly rubs are a gateway activity that leads to chasing bunnies and fetching frisbees."

'Will work for tummy rub.'

'Sorry I'm late - I stopped off for a beer and a back rub.'

"Combining our favorite pastimes of drinking, fishing and hot tubbing makes me realize... we should stop drinking."

"The bad news is, no walk. The good news is, unlimited belly rubs, chase around the dining room table, salmon for dinner, and you're on my bed tonight."

'This is the place I was telling you about.'

"Please excuse him...interns always worry patients don't think they're real doctors!"

Welcome to Umbilicoplasty aesthetic surgery

Surgery.

"And if this prescription doesn't work, see if you can get someone to rub your belly. That always make me feel better."

Stomach Fishing.

National Belly Button Society: Innies and Outies.

Dogs enter lottery for belly rubs.

'Freddy Kameahmeah, uncrowned king of Hula dancers. His hoop hasn't seen the ground in six months.'

'You've had your tongue, ears, nose and naval pierced. Now I think it's time you went to a therapist and had your psychological armor pierced.'

'Inny' and 'Outy' trays in the Dept. of Belly Buttons

Chiropodist

'Next week, next butt!'

"… Now a little to the left … that's it, honey, nice … mmm … OK, now get lost."

Belly Dancing School

"I understand you want to register a complaint about your liposuction...what appears to be the problem?"

Belly button night. Outies only.

Then we agree - 3 out of 3 doctors prefer 'innies' to 'outties.'

'Let's go - play ball! Quit staring at your navels!!'

"Did you wax your chest or did someone at the office have to use the AED on you again?"